Please come back.

I don't know what to say tonight. None of this can be real. I am living a nightmare. I miss her so much. I had her 7 months ago, yet she's gone already? I just don't understand any of this bullshit. I just don't understand.

There is no way that this is the baby that was in that horrific hospital room. There is no way she died. I look at these pictures and I am in utter confusion and disbelief. 

The world carries on without you
but nothing remains the same
I'll be lost without you
until the last of days

The sun is in the east,
rising for the beasts
and the beauties
if only I could tear it down,
plant it in the ground to warm your face

I built myself a castle on the beach
watching as it slid into the sea

The world carries on without you
but nothing remains the same
I'll be lost without you
until the last of days
until the last of days

-A Fine Frenzy

Come back now please Vi. This has gone on long enough. I need you to come back. Please baby girl, please come back to me. Thank you for the bumble bee today, but I need you back. I don't want to only be able to know you're with me because of a bumble bee. Just come back to me please. Please come back. Please. Please Violet. Please baby girl. Please come back. I can't do this without you. I can't be the mom I need to be to Lyvi, without you. I can't be me, without you. I can't be, without you. I need you back. Please come back. I love you my sweet girl. My love should have saved you. I love you more than anyone has ever loved another person, ever. But, it wasn't enough. Because you still died. I am so sorry. I am so so sorry that I didn't save you. Please forgive me, and come back to me. Please.